lawyrrob

Ken Burns is a boring motherfucker.

2007-10-30T06:26:00.000-07:00

Let's face it.

Ken Burns, he of the mournful cello interludes and soft focus interviews is a uniquely boring individual. Only Ken Burns could take the fascinating sport of American baseball and turn it into a turgid, lifeless mass.

And only Ken Burns could take the single most important event of the Twentieth Century and find absolutely nothing to say about it in twelve hours of carefully crafted footage.

I have to admit. Like so much else in his oeuvre, I couldn't get past three or four hours of his latest claptrap. And I'm fascinated by World War II. Used to have two thousand books on the subject. But I think it's time that we face our memories and recollections of the Good War and have a stern conversation with ourselves.

World War II was a meatgrinder. Pure and simple. We turned a blind eye to the coming storm in Europe and Asia. We abused those countries that became our enemies and acted shocked when they came at us, frothing for vengeance.

We should be justly proud of the young men and women who served in that War. Just like any of our wars. But we should be honest about our reasons for entering the conflict. And the horrible things that happened to the ill-prepared armed forces we sent into battle.

And that's where Burns fall down. There's lots of montages about how this person or that person felt about this or that.

How does he manage to blunt the testimony of E.B. Sledge, writer of "With the Old Breed," quite simply the best memoir of combat ever. Sledge was a Marine at Pelelieu and Okinawa. His descriptions of the war against Japan are horrifying. And awe-inspiring. But apparently his naked depiction of a genocidal war of extermination didn't fit into Burns' carefully crafted narrative. Nor does the personal aftermath of Sledge's war.

Where is the anger at a country that sent barely trained National Guard units to their doom in New Guinea? Where is the sober commentary on the fact that even in 1944 and 1945, we sent young men to die in Sherman tanks, a design already obsolete by 1940? What about the homefront, where angry citizens demanded that the Navy not allow convalescing burn victims to walk the street, lest they horrify our sensibilities?

Where is anything, anything at all, that suggests that World War Two was not a great adventure, but a horrendous, avoidable conflicted started by bitter old men and paid for in the blood of the innocent?

You won't find it in Ken Burns' world. Because Ken Burns, intellectual lightweight, is an exact reflection of our juvenile and adolescent mindset. A country who would prefer to be comforted rather than forced to think. A country that prefers fantasy to reality. And a country that produces not historians, but brandnames.

Do yourself a favor. Read a book by Donald Burgett, paratrooper at Normandy, Bastogne and Arnhem. Read "War Without Mercy" by John Dower. And force yourself to think.

And Jesus, would somebody point that guy to a Supercuts?

Yeah yeah yeah...

2007-10-26T21:56:00.000-07:00

I know it's been a long time. But I feel like writing again. So here goes.

The other day I realized I'm never going to be in the band Wire.

Not only that, but I was never in Wire. I wasn't there at the beginning and a bunch of English guys came up with the idea before me.

Man. I'm depressed.

What really bothers me about John McCain...

2007-04-17T06:22:00.000-07:00

Is that he seems to have pilot disease.

What I mean by that, is that like a lot of former combat pilots (meaning airplane jocks), McCain seems to believe, deep in his skull, that the application of modern combat technology can win a guerrilla war. He's flat wrong of course. And McCain, who obviously was familiar with the North Vietnamese mindset, should know better.

We didn't lose that war because we didn't bomb enough, because we didn't erase enough targets. We lost because the Vietnamese people were willing to suffer as many casualties as it took to obtain self-determination. We saw the war in terms of a geopolitical contest. They saw it as a revolution.

I fear the same holds true now. Our concerns in Iraq are regional. We don't want a base for Al Qadae. We worry about the rise of militant Shiism. And we don't seem to understand that millions of young, unemployed Iraqi men simply want us out of their country so that they can get about governing themselves.

Watching John McCain I'm sure he doesn't get this. And that is why, although I respect him, I could never, ever, vote for him.

I ain't the brightest.

2007-04-10T06:12:00.000-07:00

I ain't the brightest.

One should really concentrate while lifting weights. I allowed my mind to wander while bench pressing. After struggling with rep number seven for thirty seconds, my brain finally snapped in and I realized I was pushing the bar against the rack. No amount of pushing was going to make it go higher. So basically I strained my back.

Brilliant.

Yaqui Easter

2007-04-09T06:25:00.000-07:00

So this weekend obviously was Easter, a time of the year I can't help getting cynical about. You know, the whole ritual of the church, and the happy coincidence that Easter happens right about the same time as the Spring Equinox and all the extra stuff the church has welded onto a story that really didn't need embellishment. So anyway, on Friday night when my buddy Jeff said we should ride our bikes down the Yaqui dances, I was less than enthusiastic. But I eventually assented.

The Yaqui are a proud and fierce desert people, whose tribe, like the O'odham, is scattered across both sides of the border. There are three or four Yaqui villages in and around Tucson, including one about a mile and a half from my house. Easter is by far the most important ritual season for the Yaqui. Their religion is a mix of native tradition and old time Catholicism. Easter is celebrated for weeks. The culmination is the final weekend where dances and ceremonies occur around the clock.

So we headed down around eleven o'clock. The ceremonies occur around the village square, one of end of which is dominated by a three walled chapel. The ceremonies for Good Friday were reaching their peak.

On the floor, at the front of the chapel was a plaster figure of Jesus, maybe a foot and a half tall, and very old. Surrounding the figure were twelve kneeling Yaqui teenagers, half men, half women. The men wore robes and white cowls. The girls also wore robes and purple crowns. All of them carried flags. One by one, villagers approached to kneel before Jesus, to ask for blessing from the coming year. They brought their children. They left candles and other offerings. As each knelt before the Son of Man, the attending children raised and dipped their flags in obvious benediction.

Behind this circle, filling the space in the church, the elders of the tribe sat and sang mournful songs. This was a day to reflect on the crucifixion of Jesus, on the sacrifice he made.

There were other people inside. A number of small children were present and kneeling, wearing garlands of flowers in their hair and carrying small sticks. In one corner, a pile of children slept. Obviously, they were working in shifts.

There were flowers everywhere. Photography is not allowed and it's difficult for me to convey the colors. The masks and helmets of the dancers. All the paper and real flowers. The costumes. It all marks the occasion as very serious, not in a dead way, but in one that is both solemn and profoundly beautiful.

Outside the church, people milled about. Observers like us. Masked and costumed figures bearing rattles and bells, clacking sticks in rhythm. And keeping watch were a few dozen members of the Tribe's religious society, clad in black capes and black hats, there to keep order and maintain the solemnity appropriate for the occasion.

These men, and they are all men, keep watch over the ceremony and make sure that visitors approach with due respect. They take the responsibility seriously. Men join the society as their end of a promise to God, a vow usually made during the illness of a small child. Often both child and father swear devotion in exchange for good health.

In any case, Jeff and I were just standing and watching when two of these men approached and grabbed us by the elbow. "Will you help us?" they asked.

Flanked by these men, we were led into the church itself. We removed our hats and knelt among the people. Scattered about the church were flowers and santos, and all of the intricately decorated biers that bore the plaster figures of Mary and Jesus to the church itself. We had no idea what was going on, so we just knelt and watched.

Person after person approached Jesus for their blessing, including a young widow who, as she knelt, burst into sobs and had to be helped up and away. Finally, after about an hour, the songs stopped, everyone stood, and black clad figures motioned us forward.

People dropped a shroud over Jeff and handed him the plain wooden cross from the church. The cross was probably five feet tall. Another person thrust a flickering Coleman lantern into my hand. Facing the courtyard, the crowd parted, making a corridor we were obviously intended to walk down. Members of the society and the masked figures flanked us on both sides as we hesitantly strode forward with the encouragement of a few elders.

Slowly walking forward, the entire village fell into step behind us. We marched out of the courtyard and into the pueblo itself, toward the first fallen cross. Obviously we were going to make the entire circuit of the Stations of the cross.

We walked slowly. Very slowly. The village sang and candles flickered. The men in masks (not unlike kachinas) danced before us, rapping on their sticks. As we passed each station, a young man raised each fallen cross. At the fourth station we paused and faced left, down an empty street.

At the other end of the street appeared another large group of tribal members, led by more masked men. The two groups of masked men rushed and feinted at each other, clacking their sticks and yelling. Suddenly, with a great yell, the groups rushed toward each other as fireworks suddenly exploded into the sky, red, yellow, green and blue. Smoke filled the air, masked figures flashed by us as we strode forward and the singing got louder.

There were two more "battles" on the way back to the church. At the end, they took the cross from Jeff and put it back in the church. A few thanked us for our help, and the ceremonies began again, with a lighter tone, for Jesus had now returned from the dead.

Suffice to say, in the face of such sincere faith, I lost a little of my cynicism about the season. I'm still walking about two feet off the earth.

Did all that really happen? Was it just a dream?

Oracle Ridge to Red Ridge

2007-03-22T05:41:00.000-07:00

I have no idea why, but the north side of the Catalinas aren't nearly as well traveled as the south side. Go figure. Because some of my favorite hikes are on the north side. Like this one. I started out on the south end of Oracle Ridge trail. The north end terminates in, drumroll please, the town of Oracle. Oracle is where I'll start my proposed four day camping trip. This day, I walked about three miles of the trail until I came to a saddle and turned west toward Red Ridge. What is Oracle Ridge like? Like this.

Again, this part of the Catalinas suffered in the wildfires of a few years ago. Still, I saw a lot of deer tracks. And deer! A few scattered cougar and bear prints. And a lot trees that looked like this. If that's not a frozen scream of pain, I don't know what it is.

Once on the saddle, it switchbacks down to the floor between Oracle Ridge and Red Ridge which parallel each other toward the summit of Mt. Lemmon. There's a pretty stream here, it runs north, toward Oracle and Pusch Ridge.

There's a secret spot before you get here. A great spot. I'd show you a photo, but some of you idiots might actually go there and do something stupid. So, unless you have the personal initiative to go see for yourself, you'll simply never know. Ha! From the valley floor, the trail turns onto Red Ridge, which runs between Oracle Ridge and Reef of Rock, pictured to the right. The trail runs pretty much straight as an arrow to the top of the summit. You gain about three thousand feet in three miles. Even that wouldn't be so bad, but the trail isn't maintained anymore. It's littered with dead trees and detrius from the fires. Stuff has started to grow, but like the survivors of any holocaust, they're tough and untrusting little buggers, covered with thorns that tug at your sleeves and ankles. The trail is almost impossible to discern at points. I got a little lost a couple of times. And once, when lost, I saw the trail and decided to take a shortcut to it down a fairly steep slope. I took a shortcut all right. On my ass for about sixty feet. It was sort of fun. Until I got home and my buddy said that it wouldn't have been fun to "get cornholed by a stump." Wise words. These are my friends. In any case, here's the high point of the trip, literally, if not figuratively. Right near here, a huge muledeer, a big ass buck just stepped out of the trees to take a look at me. He didn't seem very concerned. I can't even scare a deer. Sigh.

Next week...

2007-03-09T05:43:00.000-08:00

Is going to be really busy. I suppose that's a good thing. I have a lot of hearings to get to, and preparation for the next week to do.

I have a pro bono case that's about to explode. The way they always do. I have another one, that I thought I settled, that looks like it's going to get unsettled.

Am I only what I do? To a lot of people yes. "That's Rob, my lawyer." I love the possessive before lawyer. That's MY lawyer. Like MY dog. Or MY handgun. Makes me feel like an instrument. A tool.

Lately, I've felt better about doing the things I like to do. And extending myself enough not let my fear or trepidation keep me from doing things I want to do. Whether that's going to a club, or making small talk with the people at the bar. I'm losing my crippling lack of self-confidence.

Yet I still don't feel like I belong with any particular group. I run out of things to say. Out of interest. I find myself pulling out my cell phone. I'm pretending it rang, but really I'm just checking the time. I want to be in the mountains. I want to be alone.

But really, at base, I'm lonely.

So there's the conundrum. I want to be alone. But I want people with me. Maybe I just want the parade of individuals that wander through my life to be less random. To be more about my choice of who I want around. And less about those who think, or do, need something from me. I have no tribe. In a sense I have a pack.

I'm not trying to be too dramatic. But I think about the lone wolves that roamed this valley before they were hunted down and killed. Three Toes. Old Aguila. Ally. They lost their packs as they were hunted down, one by one. Surrounded by a cloud of coyotes and stray dogs they continued the hunt. But there was no love in the pack. There were no litters. No young to protect. Just an endless forward movement, from one bloody night to another. No wonder there were such spasms of killing. Nights when ten, twenty, a hundred sheep and cows were killed.

All that was left was their JOB. Their LIVES were over. I don't want to be like that. I know myself. I can see myself withdrawing further. Withdrawing with the family I must protect, and a cloud of folks who, for all their good points, are only there to share the kills.

There must be more. There is more. But I don't know where to find it. I don't know how to keep it. But I know, to be happy, I've got to be more than a title on a door. I know all about lawyrrob. It's personrob who baffles me. And at the end of the day, it's personrob I need to get to know. To develop. Unless I allow myself to get pushed further and further into those mountains. To the barest edges of the world. To a place where I am truly all alone. To a place where all that's left is to stand upon a hill and stare at the lights with fear. Knowing you can never, ever, go back.

I've decided to really try. Because I don't really want that to happen.

Whatever...

Scouting!

2007-03-08T19:18:00.000-08:00

I'm planning on taking a four or five day camping trip in the Catalinas, a range of mountains due north of Tucson. I figured I should take some exploratory hikes to get used to the mountains again, and to familiarize myself with some segments of trail I'll probably end up using. And of course, the cold keeps most of the semi-ambulant bags of water we call humans at home. So, in other words, little chance of seeing anyone else.

Perfect.

The Catalinas are well traveled. Probably the jewel is Mt. Lemmon, named after one of those hoop-skirted botanists who muled her way to the top in the 19th Century. There's a ski slope that's intermittently open and a lot of cabin owners who moaned incessantly when their expensive, saucer-shaped cabins went up in smoke a couple of years ago.

It was an amazing fire. You could see it charring the mountains from the city. And you could smell it downtown. I drove along the back side of the range one day and individual trees exploded like sparklers on Pusch Ridge.

Just think. If the wind had been right, the entire gated community of Saddlebrook would have been wiped out. Just the thought makes me half-hard.

But, alas, there is no God, and the seeping taupe stain of the subdivisions still lives. Can't always get what you want.

So anyway. I went for a hike in the Wilderness of Rocks. Very. Very. Cool.

Like I said, there was a big fire a few years ago. A lot of the forest looks like this. It's deeply cut through by arroyos however. What happened on one side of the ridge ain't necessarily what happened on the other.

Yeah, I know. Dead trees. Big surprise. But check these things out. I'm not sure if these died in the fire, or more recent lightning strikes.

I got lost more than once. But that's the beauty of canyon hiking. You can't really get lost in a tube. I lost the trail up here twice and went straight up a tough steep hill that seemed to be on the trial, walking all the way around looking for it. I couldn't find it and just wandered into the forest. Eventually, I came out on the face of the Catalinas. I spent some time sitting on a rock, staring into space and talking out loud to myself. After half an hour or so I came to some conclusions. This next one is the view when I stood and turned around. Magnificent mountains. Say it out loud. Magnificent mountains... Sigh...

There was a lot of ice on the trail. A ton of snow. I'll spare you all the bear tracks. Who cares right? Ice is a near magical thing. Check out this shred of water, slowly twisting in the breeze.

A good walk. A very good walk.

I'm not sure where...

2007-02-28T16:51:00.000-08:00

I belong. But I'm pretty sure it isn't right here. I don't seem to really jibe with the people around here anymore. And I find this city I once loved to be cloying and much, much too big. There are places I get along. And people I get along with.

They're just not here.

Maybe someplace north of here. Maybe sooner than later.

Stay tuned.

Return to Sky Island!!

2007-02-28T10:29:00.000-08:00

I went back to Madera Canyon last weekend. Another great hike. Got there early enough, the whole place was deserted. At one point, I had all the names of these mountains committed to memory. That was some time ago. Ahem. In any case, what does it matter? I had a great time!

Again, there was a lot of snow on the ground. Right around here, I ran into three old guys. Had to be around seventy at least, maybe older. Just out enjoying the woods together. They asked where I was headed, I told them, and we spent a few pleasant moments chatting. I admire guys that age who aren't afraid of the woods. Hope I'm like that when I'm that age.

This is Josephine Saddle, where all the major trails in Madera eventually converge. Near here, in a freak snowstorm, three Boy Scouts lost their lives. I'd like to say I paused and reflected. In reality, I was way too freaking cold to think of anything but the jacket I'd left in the car. (Spot the irony, win a dollar!)

A little farther along the trail. Note the change in elevation from the first pic to this one. These are basically the same mountains. Left me a little breathless. The snow in this portion of the trail was thick and trackless. Not a soul around. Nice. The wind eventually was blocked by the mountains in front of me. Even nicer.

Those far off mountains are in Mexico.

A view back along the trail. You can probably spot it. Again, there was a lot of snow. At this point however, I was no longer cold.

This was another trip where I saw tracks and heard noise, but didn't see much in the way of wildlife. You could feel it out there though. I saw more cougar tracks too. Some bobcat. Raccoon. Etc.

Observatories on Mt. Hopkins. At least I remembered that name!

This is a grove of quaking aspen about three miles from the end of the hike. Beautiful trees. A nice thing to see on the way out. A beautiful day. Will I be back? You betcha. With a jacket!

The walk that made me sick....

2007-02-20T05:11:00.000-08:00

I didn't feel so hot when I woke up last Saturday. But damn it, I'd been planning this hike for two weeks and I wasn't going to let a case of the sniffles stop me!

In retrospect, I am an ass. But it was still a great walk. I went to the Pajarita Wilderness. It's a spot near Nogales. I decided to walk Sycamore Canyon, about a five mile hike that leads right to the Mexican Border.

There are signs all over the place warning you about smugglers and illegal immigration. I think National Parks should also have signs that say "Warning! You may encounter morons on your walk! Proceed with caution!" Anyway, let's get to the hike!

This is about the start of the hike. As you can see, there's a lot of water in the canyon. Sycamore Creek is one of the only perennial streams in Baja Arizona. By the way, there are probably a hundred canyons in Arizona named Sycamore Canyon. Probably because in such a dry land such huge trees are startling. And also because the blessed people at the Park Service aren't real long on imagination. That's why you get such great names as Big Rock and Sandy Wash. Oh well. You usually get what's advertised. In an case, note that the level of the water is just about where the "path" is.

The path is really more of a suggestion. It's hard to get lost in a slot canyon. At least, that's how the thinking goes. Here's a picture of the "path" a little later on. Yeah, my feet got wet. More than once.

In parts, the canyon spreads out, and you get these great rock formations like one would see in the Chiricahuas. Very pretty. While I was taking this, a mule deer exploded from the brash to my right. For a moment, all my brain could register was a long tawny blur headed for me. I almost wet myself. Almost. I'm pretty tough after all.

There's a lot of great camping sites around here. And side canyons that beg to be explored. I'm definitely coming back.

This is another portion of the stream. There is great beauty here. Humbling beauty.

This is a pretty tough hike. Besides the water, there's a bunch of spots where the trail just sort of ends, and you have to do a bit of climbing. Right near here, there's a spot where you have to grab a rope that some Ranger helpfully attached to an eyebolt drilled into the cliff face. Very helpful. On the way in, I used it and forgot to move it into a spot where I could grab it from the other side. This led to what I'm sure was a very comical view of me, face pressed into the cliff, wildly flailing with my right arm to grab a rope I could not see. Did I fall? Nope. Did I think about falling? You bet!

On the way back, as always, I started to run into other hikers. Because they are often so very loud, I usually know that they are there before they know I'm around. Good thing. That way, I can hop off the trail and work around them without having to have that stupid hiking conversation:

Them: Hey!

Me: Hey.

Them: How far did you go!

Me: Unintelligible mumble.

Them: Nice day!

Me: Uh. Yup.

Then the money question.

Them: You, uh, out here by yourself?

This always creeps me out. I know they're probably harmless and just groping for something to say. But geez. I usually say, no, there are twenty-five friends of mine up the trail. And they're armed to the teeth. I'm not that into guns. But people like these make me want to carry one out here. Anyway, enough of the rant.

Anyway, on the way back, I ran into a guy here who just bawling from the depths of his soul. Real, racking sobs. I have no idea what was going on. Nor, I must admit, did I care all that much. Hey, life is tough. I told a friend about it that night. He rather sardonically suggested, "Maybe he lost his true love." Hey, maybe. But as everyone knows, the way you mourn that is in a dark room. With a bottle. An expensive bottle. Don't ruin my hike with your tears! It's a National Forest. It belongs to everyone you selfish bastard!!

More from the walk. This is another part of the "path". The nice thing though, is that the further you get in, the fewer people you see. It's pretty quiet out here.

I saw a lot of animals. Heard more. Fish, frogs, the aforementioned deer, hawks, kestrels, etc. There were also a ton of jays that loudly complained of my presence each time I approached a canyon wall. I found this quite rude. It's a National Forest guys. It belongs to all of us! Jackasses.

The closer you get to the US-Mexico border, the more trash you start seeing. Cans of food. Clothing. Etc. Sort of ruins the "I am in the wilderness" mood. I have sympathy though. This can't be a good place to cross the border. While there's water here, you have quite a hike to get back to a real road. And it's really up and down terrain. And ungodly hot during the spring and summer. I feel for these people.

Anyway, that was the hike. A great one. I'll definitely be back. On the way out, I pushed it a little hard. I was feeling good. Had a good sweat going. Leaping from rock to rock. I got home and basically collapsed. Two days later, I'm still sniffling. Sniff!

Stupid. But worth it.

I wonder...

2007-02-10T07:33:00.000-08:00

How in the world the administration and military expect us to believe that Iran has been running weaponry to Iraq after it is now indisputable that they lied about WMD in Iraq?

Do they really think we're that stupid?

Better question: Are we that stupid?

What quantifiable good has our presence in the region done? And I mean ever? We've managed to radicalize most of the region. What the fuck do we do now?

I'm starting to think that there's little left to do, and perhaps very few options other than a long-term, full-blown, military occupation of the region. I don't know what the alternative is now. And that makes me profoundly embarrassed.

I don't want to be a Roman.

Plug!

2007-02-10T07:20:00.000-08:00

I've been doing yoga for about a year and a half. For those of us who ruined our joints during high school contact sports, it's a great way to strengthen core muscles and maintain flexibility. Also, it's something those of us with constraints on our time can do at home. In the morning or evening.

With that in mind, I would like to endorse the work of Rodney Yee. His DVDs have clear, concise instructions. Also, while he doesn't ignore the spiritual, quasi-religious side of yoga, he doesn't cram it down your throat. Instead, he urges you to concentrate, and relax.

All of his videos are pretty good. Some few are for people more flexible than I, and a few contain very intensive arm balances that might be out of reach for the casual practicioner.

I can however, without reservation endorse both Yoga Burn and Total Body Workout from the Power Yoga series.

Namaste.

Hmmmm....

2007-02-09T18:14:00.000-08:00

Two court dates in a row.

I have pulled a rabbit from a hat.

I know too much to think I did it.

Even a blind squirrel finds a nut sometimes.

My little brother...

2007-02-09T18:05:00.001-08:00

Turns thirty today!!!

Why does that make me feel old? Sheesh.

He's better looking too.

That sucks.

Like sands through the hourglass...

2007-02-08T05:26:00.000-08:00

Geez, is it Wednesday already?

Where does the time go? Used to be, that the days dragged on and on. Now they going ripping by so fast. Work is good. Business is picking up. It's getting harder to keep track of every little thing.

Got letters to write today. Research to do. Clients to speak to.

I got my new camera in the mail. I'm so happy I could just squeak. It's supercool. Most of it is slightly above me too. I'm going to have a lot of fun with this thing I can tell. One more thing to learn about.

I'm trying to figure out where to take the girls this weekend My ex is off with her boyfriend, so I'll have them straight through until next Friday. Hmm. A short roadtrip would seem to be in order. But it's so freaking cold! Maybe we'll go to Nogales or something. Bah. Who knows?

Pima Canyon, Super Bowl Sunday

2007-02-05T05:40:00.000-08:00

Pima Canyon is part of the Pusch Ridge Wilderness. As you will see, it's very close to Tucson, but if you get there early and hike far enough in, you'll forget all about the city. Until the way back that is when all the yuppies are puffing up the trail.

This is at the start. The cross in the foreground is for a young soldier, presumably killed in Iraq. Sad.

This is the view over your shoulder about a half mile into the hike.

About a mile and a half in, you'll cross the streambed a bunch of times. It's easy to lose the trail in here. I did about fifty times. There was a lot of water in the canyon, we've had a lot of rain. Plenty of tracks around the pools; coues deer, coyotes, raccoons, etc.

I don't know what it is about nests that I like so much. Maybe just looking at a carefully built home. And the promise and excitement of new life, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant.

I know. I like dead trees too much. So sue me. Something so old and imposing has a majesty in death. And they look cool too!

I couldn't keep this shoe tied. It was driving me nuts. Then, I tied it so tight, I couldn't get it untied at home. Arrggghhh!!!!

This is one of a series of metates in the canyon, spots where women ground corn. Back in the day, this must have been a magical place to live. I like lingering at spots like this. I like to imagine a lingering good energy around the area.

Soon after this, the trail goes up an hugs the east wall of the canyon. If you go far enough, you go up to the top of Mount Kimball and then back down Finger Rock trail. About two and half miles from where I stopped is the habitat of a herd of bighorn sheep. I was running out of time though. Maybe next trip. This is what you see if you look back over your shoulder.

I ate lunch on the trail, about three hundred feet above the canyon floor. I think the carrot cake is a really good flavor of Clif bar. I really like Clif bars. I walked into the canyon with two bottles of water, two apples and a Clif bar. On the way back I ran into a ton of people who weren't going to walk nearly as far as I did who were just dripping with equipment. Walking poles, weird hats, specialized water delivery systems. Christ, you would have thought they were preparing to assault K2, not take a leisurely dayhike. And they all looked so deathly serious. Whatever.

I sometimes forget how beautiful the desert can be.

A good hike. And not a bad way to spend the first half of Super Sunday.

I don't like being human.

2007-02-01T21:20:00.000-08:00

I fucked something up the other day. Through carelessness really.

Not irrecoverable. But I hate myself for having done it.

I feel like a jackass. I know some people probably think I am a jackass. But I'm not really.

Just arrogant. And too sure of myself at times.

Anyway. I'll get over it.

The most frightening thing you will ever do...

2007-02-01T21:16:00.000-08:00

Is to let a woman truly know you.

Most of us can only do it once.

Overjoyed...

2007-01-31T08:23:00.000-08:00

I think for all of us, there are songs, for whatever reason, that really ring true. It's not necessarily a direct connection with the music or lyrics, but something in a song's delivery and mood that captures something not just about the artist, but us.

To me, that's what art is about. Like an indescribable connection to a painting. For instance, do we even know who the Mona Lisa was? Or what her relationship to DaVinci was? Or what he was thinking when he painted that? But who hasn't been moved by that smile, those half-lidded eyes? And who can really explain why? A song can do that too.

For me, Stevie Wonder's "Overjoyed," is such a song. I've been listening to it a lot. There's a dreamy melancholy to it that I think captures something about me. And how I relate to the world.

Find it. And give it a listen.

As long as it's Funk-ee!

2007-01-30T09:33:00.002-08:00

This is Casimir Funke. The first man to posit the existence of "vitamines".

Obviously a brilliant guy. Like all us Poles.

Ahem.

Madera Canyon, Kent's Spring Trail

2007-01-27T13:33:00.000-08:00

This is where I went this morning. Madera Canyon is what ecologists call a mountain island, basically one ecosystem completely surrounded by another. In this case, coniferous forest, surrounded by high desert. Take a look. Click on the images for a larger picture.

This is on the way. You have to go through Green Valley to get there. Someday, I'll put up a post about that weird little burg, but for now, let's get to the hike!

I was hoping to see wildlife, but yipe! That's a cougar track. And a big one. This print was the size of my palm. These tracks were mixed into the tracks of someone's big ass dog. And a horse. And a couple of people. Anyway...

These are the views after a quick scramble up. To the left of this you can see the bright blue ponds of the copper mines. Or, as I refer to them, "the big fucking mistakes." Ahem.

It was really cold by the way. Luckily, I had a Pendleton and a hat in the car. Phew!

Our hero. Note the snow. Do I look rakish and devil-may-care?
I've always wanted to look devil-may care!

Did I mention the snow?
The path up to the ridge was really icy. More than some people would care for.

What can I say about the pic to the right? It's a beautiful place. It was a great walk.

Do you ever get the feeling you're being watched? Sometimes, in the woods, I get that feeling. If you look past me almost at the top of the path, you can see the spot where I slipped and fell flat on my ass.

This is the path on the way out. The whole trip is a total of six miles or so. The path back is a heck of a lot easier than the path up. Damn, but it was slippery.

I feel really, really bad because about a quarter mile before this, I ran into two chatty guys coming the other way. They asked me how it was further up and if they'd be okay wearing their sport shoes.

I sort of shrugged and said, "Well, you made it up here." Oops.

I hope they were all right. That part of the trail was pretty dicy.

FINIS

Bullshit by any other name...

2007-01-27T06:40:00.000-08:00

I've been watching this documentary series on the Military Channel called "Alpha Company" about a group of Marines in Iraq. It's very well done.

What's annoying though, are all the ads aimed at recruiting new soldiers during the commercials. Most are aimed at parents, "You made them strong, we'll make them Army strong!"

I wonder what the ads would be like if they were really serious and accurate. Imagine an ad with a solemn looking colonel at a desk. Saying something like this, "If you let your son join the Army, we promise to return all the pieces of him that we can find."

Seriously, I hope there aren't people out there that buy this shit. I really, really hope not. I have a deep respect for anyone who wears the uniform. I think it's a viable career choice. But not while this crap is going on.

What a waste.

The Three Stooges...

2007-01-26T17:49:00.000-08:00

My Uncle John. My Dad. And me.

The Ferrier men. There aren't many of us.

But we'll surprise you.

How about a nice big cup of shut the f@#$ up?

2007-01-26T11:23:00.000-08:00

I get really tired of my colleagues in the profession. One of the things I get tired of are the circular phone calls. The sort I mean are where one lawyer comes up with a stack of figures/bills/etc., that they've been busily calculating for three hours then calls me up, downloads the information to me, and then insists that right then and there, I stipulate to whatever it is he/she wants. Then, should I have the nerve to say that I really need to review my own file and make sure the numbers being shouted meet with mine, I get Petulant Whiny Lawyer in response who spends the next twenty minutes explaining how unbelievably unreasonable I am.

SHUT THE FUCK UP!!

And stop wasting my client's time with your closing argument jackass! Fine, we disagree. That's what hearings are for.

This is where older lawyers are a pleasure to deal with. I called up a guy the other day. Said, "This is the number I came up with." He asked me to fax the worksheet. I did. Then he faxed his. We reviewed and then had a five minute phone conversation. Done. No fuss. No muss.

That's what the practice should be like. To my mind anyway.

Speaking of eating...

2007-01-25T11:34:00.000-08:00

It's been a long time since I've buried my face in a Navajo taco. Man, I love a good taco. I like the way the juice runs down your face when you really dig in.

Man, it might not be good for you. But it's good to you.

If you know what I mean. And some of you probably do.

Dogs don't lie...

2007-01-25T05:27:00.000-08:00

Or talk. But no matter. This dog has the right idea. Skippy makes the best peanut butter. Super chunk specifically. Jif is okay. I'm all for being healthy, but natural peanut butter is simply a pain in the ass. Unless you enjoy carefully stirring the oil back into the peanuts. A horrible task. Or unless you need to spackle a wall. Then it comes in handy.

Chunky peanut butters are better than creamy. This is a fact, not opinion. So shut up.

Last, a word about low-fat brands. Don't bother. In my mind, a low-fat alternative should taste almost exactly the same as its high fat counterpart. Otherwise, it's just a waste of time. Like trying to replace crack with cup after cup of hot coffee. Sort of. Or near beer. Better to go cold turkey.

For Godssakes be a man!

I really love my kids...

2007-01-24T18:22:00.000-08:00

But sometimes they drive me nuts.

I wish my ex-wife would feed them something other than hot dogs.

That would make it easier to feed them actual food. You know, the kind that I spend an hour cooking?

That would be nice.

It would be nice if my ex-wife would take one of our many conversations about this to heart and actually feed them something that doesn't come in a can, a box, or a microwavable tray.

That would make my life easier.

I'm a reasonable man.

Right?

Is that guy really our President?

2007-01-24T14:04:00.000-08:00

Holy cow.

When you can't even get all your Republican buddies to stand up and applaud, you have serious issues.

So the President wants to focus on domestic issue? How about this?

My neighbor's son is in Iraq. I'd like it if he didn't get his brains blown out. How's that for a domestic issue? Asshole.

Is it really too much to ask that my president be smarter than I am? Really?

Not that the members of my own party are all that better. Although I did like James Webb's little "we will show the President the way" comment. Classic. As was him telling the president when jackass asked about his son in Iraq, "That's between me and my boy."

Man, when you can't get any love from Reagan's Secretary of the Navy, geez, it's time to leave the building.

Barak Obama's looking presidential. He's got a blue tie and everything. He even managed to adopt a solemn and fatherly tone last night. And, it looks like Hillary's finally made the complete transformation into the lovable, jive-talking robot we always knew she had inside her.

Why does my stomach hurt when I think about 2008? President McCain. Ow.

Just saw a hawk outside. Pigeons tremble.

God's dog

2007-01-24T13:42:00.000-08:00

I saw two coyotes this morning at about Pima and Tucson. Just jogging along doing the things coyotes do.

I've always thought they were amazing animals. Sometimes, when I forget to close my back gate, they'll come jogging through my yard on the way who knows where from the alley. Often, I'll be out on the porch drinking coffee and they trot right past, close enough to touch.

I'm not sure what it says about me that coyotes don't find me threatening.

Hmm.

Blech...

2007-01-24T13:32:00.000-08:00

I had a horrible, expensive meal last night.

There's this place called Fiorito's down the street that postures itself as an Italian bistro. My dad and I both ordered pasta pomodoro, a classic Italian dish, noodles with tomatoes, basil, garlic and olive oil. It should be a plate buzzing with vibrant flavor and colors. Especially when you're charged twelve dollars for it.

Instead, it was gummy and incredibly bland. Why oh why, isn't there an Italian place in this city that has some notion of how to cook pasta? Overcooked pasta is inexcusable in general. At an overpriced bistro, it should actually be punishable by death. Or by people going someplace else to eat. Ahem.

In any case, defeated by the pasta, I decided to have some of my daughters' pizza, thinking, "how can you really mess up hot cheese?" By using old, too old, canned tomatoes, that's how. Ewww. Even the four year old wanted none of it.

To top it off, we ordered dessert for the kids. It took twenty (20) minutes for a bowl of vanilla ice cream to arrive at the table.

I'm not sure what was going on. But I know I'm not going to try and find out.

Did you ever get the feeling...

2007-01-17T19:41:00.000-08:00

That you should have sold Cadillacs for a living?

I do.

Sometimes.

Let's face it....

2007-01-17T16:30:00.000-08:00

Plankton, is, by far, the best character on Spongebob Squarepants. I mean, come on, evil laughs, dreams of world domination, crazy, intensely diabolical plans, annnnnnnd, he's plankton.

To me, Plankton is a symbol. A reminder that no matter who we are, or how uni-celled, we all have that special thing inside of us that makes us capable of ruling the Earth with an iron fist.

God bless you Plankton.

Plug...

2007-01-17T05:34:00.000-08:00

I love to cook. But most of what I enjoy eating, my two girls, age 7 and 4, do not. Hey kids! How about a big plate of carne adovada!

So I love this book. The recipes are super simple. And while the flavors are simple as well, the flavors are big. Among other things, it has the best recipe for a whole chicken I've ever had. And the recipe probably has five ingredients, including the chicken and some water.

If, like me, you have to cook for kids, but you still want meals that will please your adult palate, go for this without hesitation. You'll also save a ton of cash.

One caveat. These are not low-fat recipes. Some of them involve using prepackaged food. So if you're the type of overactive weirdo who can't stand it if your kid eats a Kraft single or a slice of white bread, this book is probably not for you. If however, you're someone I could stand talking to, buy it. Buy it now.

I said now!

A real alternative..

2007-01-16T19:26:00.000-08:00

I have to admit, I like John Edwards for president. I was at the Volunteer Lawyers Program luncheon and he showed up, sua sponte to speak to us. He praised volunteerism as a virtue in lawyers and said a few things about the state of the world.

The point is, there were no tv cameras. No journalists at all. Just about a hundred lawyers eating lunch. And a mariachi band. Several local pols, notably local harpie Gabbie Giffords, tried to appear with him. And asked to bring the press. He flatly refused.

He came because those of us there cared about poor people. Like he does.

We could do worse. Hell, we already have.

Am I a threat to society?

2007-01-16T17:26:00.000-08:00

Hmm. Maybe. Law, especially litigation, encourages some anti-social tendencies. Argument. Glee at other's misfortune. A desire to wade hip-deep in the blood of your enemy.

Not much separates me from your average gladiator in temperment. I see crap everyday that would have shocked me ten years ago. Hear stories and see people do things I would never have believed. Hear people's most inner secrets. Sometimes, I stop myself and realize that what I do, what I'm doing, has a profound effect on people's lives. Forever.

I'm starting to wonder how long it will be until someone, somewhere, with a longstanding grudge comes to blow my brains out for what I did to him/her, or what they perceive I did. For any lawyer will tell you, our lives and our careers are ruled by facts.

And the facts will reign.

Da news...

2007-01-16T08:23:00.000-08:00

So Barak Obama (sp?) is running for president. File under yawn. Why should he be president? Other than the collective guilt of white America that is.

It's cold here today. Apparently, we have a streak of three nights below freezing. I believe it. It was cold as hell this morning.

My dad and uncle are coming into town for some car show. It'll be good to see them.

Another day at work. Another client is due to come in. That's good. Have a PI who volunteered to help with my Justice Project case coming in too. That's a good thing.

More later.

Some of the places I've been lately.

2007-01-16T05:33:00.000-08:00

This is the Chiricahuas. Geez, but it was cold.
This is in Chaco Canyon. An amazing place. This is where I spent Thanksgiving. Cold, got a touch of frostbite one morning.
This is a tree on the way to Morenci. Apparently bowhunters like shooting arrows into it. A twisty road. Took me three hours to go 75 miles.

These are some of the places I've been lately. Ha!

Out of synch...

2007-01-15T17:39:00.000-08:00

You know I find it odd that NPR was all atwitter about the supposed inappropriateness of the executions in Iraq. The implication seemed to be that Iraquis should have considered our feelings about MLK and his legacy and should have had more respect.

Hmm. I wonder if this means we'll stop dropping bombs during Ramadan. Or freaking out when a Congressman wants to be sworn in with a Koran. Doubt it somehow.

We'll just have to get used to it. We don't care what they think. And they, most emphatically, do not care what we think.

I'm comfortable with that.

Sooo....

2007-01-15T16:27:00.000-08:00

Had an okay MLK holiday. I worked. Supposed to have three potential clients coming in. One actually showed up. But the one has a problem, has money, and I think I can help him. Should be a nice piece of business. And, handled right, should turn into the sort of business that's recurring. He runs a small business. Big businesses have been bullying him. It stops today.

Being a lawyer means you exist in a funny sort of duality. People come in with problems and sure, there's sympathy and empathy. But there's also a part of you that says, "Thank God. This case will be expensive!"

Not that I don't try to be cost effective. Certainly I do. A lot of things, most things can be handled with a phone call and a letter. And that's how they get handled. And you bill the client twenty-two fifty and move on.

But the sight of major litigation in the offing.... Well, it's the same feeling I imagine a Sioux scout felt when he crested a rise and saw the buffalo before him. All that meat. Freedom from want. Security for his family. Sure he respected and worshiped the buffalo. It didn't keep him from the slaughter.

Man, that was a bit dramatic. My blood's up. Suddenly I want a horse. And a lance.

I really need another computer for the girls. If only to stop the "Can I go to Bratz.com?" chatter. Driving me nuts.

In the last three months, I estimate that I have made 562 cheese sandwiches.

Tomorrow is another day. Huzzah!

Hard at Work?

2007-01-12T09:01:00.000-08:00

So here I sit in my suit and tie, waiting for the clients to come in.

It's a beautiful day. Storm clouds on the horizon, moving fast toward the northeast.

Made machaca last night. Researched a Rule Of Family Law Procedure. I'm sitting here trying to upload a photo to the blog. It's taking an awfully long time.

Maybe I'll go out to lunch in a bit. Have a criminal client coming in soon. I like criminal work. It means I get to go to court!

Haven't even billed a smidge today. Maybe I should be worried, but I'm not.

Girls are good. I got some good hair dressing advice the other day and they actually looked somewhat presentable on the way out the door. The oldest has been spending a lot of time on Bratz.com. It's really pretty cute.

The working life...

2007-01-11T18:08:00.000-08:00

Did about two hours of actual work today. Met with a really scared guy for a bit. Ate an onion bagel, with nothing on it. Enjoyed listening to Cash Rules Everything Around Me while sitting in my chair and doing a crossword puzzle on my desk.

This is the life of a lawyer.

I'm scared. But I'm happy to have my own business. Somehow, all the balls are the air. Don't know quite how.

I'm beginning to like my new job.

I finally feel like a lawyer again.